On Saturday morning I sent J a text telling her I was going to be in the area and asked if she wanted to meet B and I for lunch at the McD playland again. I filled our pool up outside and was doing some work around the yard while we waited for a response. B was very excited to be able to go play with A again and he asked me if I could text her again and see if she could meet us.
After a few hours, she replied that they could meet us. We met up about an hour or so later. J and her friend P were outside waiting for us with A when B and I arrived (can't you understand all those A, B, C's!!??) As we walked up to their table, A came running over and gave me a big hug. I loved that! He is such a sweet little boy.
We ordered some lunch and the three boys headed in to the play area while J and I waited. She looked great and relaxed. Now that she is not currently working, she looks so rested each time I see her compared to before. I also noticed that she had gotten her hair cut. It was down her back and is now above her shoulders. She had always had it in a bun each time I have been around her, but this time had it down in back. Her hair is so curly!
Our lunch was great. We were there for about an hour and a half (and that is a long time at a McD). It wasn't rushed and it was relaxed. B and A played and the three of us adults sat around watching the boys play. I did bring up the name issue that I wanted to before and basically, she didn't like the other name I suggested. She didn't think it went with the middle name (her middle name) that we have selected. I pretty much dropped it because I do want it to be something she likes as well. I originally loved the name we have selected, I just think I have completely over analyzed it.
She told me about how she plans to breastfeed when she take the baby home for a few days and then will pump and bring us milk to the hotel. We were talking about the hospital and P asked if I was nervous. I said I really wasn't nervous but more excited. J asked me if I was afraid of seeing blood or if that makes me feel sick. I said that that didn't bother me and she said something about how the caseworker had told her she is worried I might pass out! I laughed and told her that I will do a good job!! I said she will be so proud of me when we are done! She just thinks I'm a nut because I can't ever find my car when we leave the hospital and have to walk around the garage pushing my door lock button!!
It was so nice to be with her and just felt so much more relaxed than ever.
She made a few comments that I thought were really good signs. B mentioned that his 1/2 bday is in June and she said, you are going to have a sister in June. She asked what hotel we would be at so she could bring us milk. She asked who I wanted to have come to the hospital after the baby is born. I am pretty confident that she is going to go with the adoption plan and not have a change of heart. This is her baby however, and I support her in the decision she feels is right.
How fantastic that your baby girl will have breastmilk (you know me- i'm crazy about breastmilk)!! At the hospital we were at the nurses told us that another birthmother had breastfed and how they thought it was weird. My line I told them anytime they said anything negative was- I will be able to firmly share with Baby Girl that her birthmom made a decision that was best for her. Had she chosen to breastfeed it would have been a special gift that I was unable to provide. Unfortunately her Bmom was discouraged from breastfeeding due to a medical condition.
ReplyDeleteI have always been excited about the prospect of her breastfeeding. The first time the caseworker had brought it up, she said she got a crazy look from J so I thought it was a no-go. I am happy to hear that she will be providing the baby with this.
DeleteI admire you so much for trying to BF your self. I just don't think I could go through with all of that even though I am a strong advocate for bmilk and it's benefits.
I hope it all goes according to plan and there are no surprises. The level of trust and fear that you must have right now has to be a crazy emotional roller coaster!!! <3
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